Understanding Emotional Triggers

Understanding what happens when someone is triggered is essential for managing our own emotions and supporting others. We’ve all experienced moments when a certain situation or comment evokes an intense emotional response, often seemingly out of nowhere. This is commonly referred to as being “triggered.”

The term “triggered” arises from the notion that a trigger sets off a chain reaction that is automatic. This domino effect happens spontaneously in response to stimuli perceived (consciously or subconsciously) as a threat. When a trigger is activated, your body responds to the perceived threat quickly, resulting in increased emotional reactivity and sudden behavioural change that is difficult to control.

 

The Science Behind Triggers

When someone is triggered, their brain is reacting to a perceived threat, often rooted in past experiences of intense difficulty or trauma. The amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for emotional processing, sends out an alarm, activating the body’s fight-or-flight response. This can lead to a range of physical and emotional reactions, including increased heart rate, anxiety, anger, or sadness. It is important to note that it is a lightning-fast physiological process that your cognitive, thinking brain cannot outpace. In short, we are unable to think our way out of triggers.

 

Recognizing Triggers

Triggers can be external, such as a specific word, smell, or place, or internal, such as a particular thought or memory. Recognizing what triggers us is the first step towards managing these reactions. It’s important to note that triggers are deeply personal and can vary greatly from person to person.

 

The Impact of Being Triggered

When triggered, a person might experience a flood of emotions that can feel overwhelming. This can lead to behaviours such as withdrawing from a situation, lashing out, or feeling paralysed. These reactions are often out of proportion to the immediate situation because they are connected to past unresolved experiences.

 

Managing Triggers

1. Self-Awareness: The first step in managing triggers is developing self-awareness. This involves identifying what specific experiences or stimuli trigger intense emotional responses.
2. Mindfulness: Practicing mindfulness can help in staying grounded in the present moment, making it easier to recognize when you’re being triggered and why.
3. Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Developing healthy coping mechanisms such as taking a break, deep breathing, journaling, or talking to a trusted friend can help manage the emotional surge.
4. Seeking Counselling: Sometimes, the roots of our triggers are deeply embedded in past difficulties and trauma. In such cases, seeking help from a professional therapist can be incredibly beneficial.

 

Supporting Someone Who is Triggered

When someone else is triggered, it’s crucial to respond with patience, empathy and understanding. This can be challenging in relationships particularly if the pattern involves you becoming triggered yourself. Here are some healthier ways to offer support:

1. Listen Without Judgment: Allow them to express their feelings without interrupting or offering immediate solutions. You may need to manage your own emotions.
2. Offer a Safe Space: Create an environment where they feel safe and supported. This could mean giving them space if they need it or staying close if they prefer company.
3. Encourage Counselling: If triggers are significantly impacting their daily life, gently suggest that they might benefit from talking to a therapist.
4. Be Patient: Understand that managing triggers is a process that takes time. Patience and continued support are key.

 

How Counselling Helps with Triggers

Given the automatic nature of triggers, it makes sense that it is difficult to think or talk your way out of them. When you are calm, you will tell yourself that you won’t respond like that again. Yet when the trigger arises you will find yourself automatically responding in the same way. You may think if you can pinpoint why you are triggered you can manage it, but that doesn’t always help in the moment. You may know where your emotional triggers come from, but it doesn’t stop them from automatically happening.

Triggers are subconscious and activate the nervous system so effective therapy must target these processes. Counselling techniques such as Resource Therapy and Havening go beyond traditional talk-therapy. Memories can be accessed and modified to provide the empowerment and healing that was wasn’t possible during the past event. In a safe, therapeutically guided environment the nervous system response is soothed and comforted. The result is that present day triggers can be changed, sometimes diminished and other times healed.

 

Conclusion

Understanding what happens when someone is triggered and how to manage it can lead to healthier relationships and a more compassionate society. By being aware of our own triggers and empathetically supporting others, we contribute to an environment where everyone can feel understood and safe.

 

Reflective Questions:

• What are some of your personal triggers, and how do you usually respond to them?
• How can you better support someone in your life who gets triggered?

By reflecting on these questions and taking actionable steps, we can all work towards a more understanding and supportive community.